Trump Suggests Gravity and Physics May Be to Blame for Midair Collision
Trump questions why helicopters don’t simply "go up or down" to avoid crashes.
A commercial airliner carrying 60 passengers collided with a military Black Hawk helicopter over Washington D.C., sending both aircraft hurtling into the icy waters of the Potomac River.
As rescue teams scrambled to recover survivors and investigators worked to unravel what went wrong, President Donald Trump took to his social media platform, Truth Social, to offer his own unique brand of forensic aviation analysis.
"The airplane was on a perfect and routine line of approach to the airport," Trump wrote, demonstrating his newfound expertise in air traffic control. "The helicopter was going straight at the airplane for an extended period of time. It is a CLEAR NIGHT, the lights on the plane were blazing, why didn’t the helicopter go up or down, or turn?"
This insightful question—posed with all the nuance of a child wondering why fish don’t just "get out of the way" when a boat approaches—has sparked widespread debate among aviation experts, physicists, and anyone who understands how aircraft function.
A Presidential Investigation: ‘Just Move, Bro’
The Commander-in-Chief’s frustration centered on what he called the helicopter’s failure to engage in basic evasive maneuvers, as if the pilot had a PS5 controller and simply refused to press the "dodge" button.
His post continued with the pressing question: "Why didn’t the control tower tell the helicopter what to do instead of asking if they saw the plane? This is a bad situation that looks like it should have been prevented. NOT GOOD!!!"
Aviation experts, already grappling with the logistics of two aircraft defying every fail-safe in modern aviation, found themselves forced to address an entirely new conundrum—how to explain the laws of physics to Trump.
"It's, uh, a little more complicated than just ‘going up or down,’" one FAA official said, speaking under the condition of anonymity, presumably to avoid getting pulled into a Twitter war.
"These aircraft were both likely equipped with collision avoidance systems. Something went terribly wrong. But no, aircraft don’t just vibe their way out of a midair disaster."
Others in the aviation world were quick to remind the public that aircraft are not, in fact, equipped with magical "swerve" buttons that allow pilots to gracefully pirouette out of danger.
"There are things like aerodynamics, speed, altitude, and, you know, gravity," said one pilot. "But sure, next time I'll just hit the 'jump' button."
Black Hawk Down, FAA Still Confused
The collision, which occurred near Reagan National Airport, has left investigators scrambling for answers.
Audio from air traffic control suggests controllers had warned the Black Hawk of the passenger jet’s approach, with instructions to maneuver behind it. However, something clearly went wrong, leaving 67 confirmed dead.
The Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) and the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) have launched a full-scale investigation, though some online conspiracy theorists have already floated their own hypotheses, ranging from "Biden’s deep-state sabotage" to "woke pilots focusing too much on pronouns instead of flying."
Meanwhile, American Airlines CEO Robert Isom has vowed full cooperation with authorities, while passengers' families await news.
Among those onboard were former Russian ice-skating champions-turned-coaches, a mother-daughter duo from Kansas on an athletics trip, and others whose lives were tragically upended in an instant.
Where Do We Go From Here?
As the search for survivors continues in the treacherous conditions of the Potomac, the aviation community is left grappling with the horrifying reality that, despite decades of technological advancement, disasters like this can still happen.
And as if the crash itself wasn’t enough, they now also face the monumental challenge of convincing a certain President that flying a helicopter is not the same as switching lanes in rush hour traffic.
But perhaps the most pressing question remains: will Trump’s next post suggest birds should just flap harder when they get caught in jet engines? Only time will tell.
Za-Head